hebrew to english cognate candidates https://docs.google.com/document/d/12qpbdaSTpm-vYQwdXS75jBq9a6mLdvBMOGKjekT7pnE/edit

i went to mt to get bigfoot info & the names of direct contacts.  i succeeded wildly in the first & failed badly in the second.  my best story is the one told me by an indian woman that the bigfeet used to come to indian dances & dance.  but they were so clumsy that the indians laughed which caused the bigfoot to stay away from dances.  acc. to the literature bigfeet like bigfoot athletic events. they respect indian medicine men & sometimes call upon the latter for help. they are said to have healing powers of their own. one woman saw one crying but she didnt have the nerve to ask the bf what was the matter

apart from medicine men largely indians have lost their touch w. bf but a blackfoot indian told me bf & indians were holding regular discussions nr edmonton ca

i recruited a man called kai w. a pickup to take me to dog lake to see bf.  i brought a 25 lb bag of organic carrots as a present for them.  but when we came back days later the carrots were still there.  in that same vicinity some campers that the above man knew were pelted near to the campers w. rocks to get the campers to leave.  the campers had a floodlite which they used to see a whole line of bf doing the pelting.  ive 3 such stories

on a small mountain peak which i could see abt 2 mi away from my trailer an indian i met saw 2 bf years before

but my goal is not just to collect bf stories.  it is to converse w. them.  bf are very frank abt themselves when they meet people they can trust.  

a man on the olympic peninsula was sleeping off a drunk on his car hood when he was awoken by a bf who told the man the name of the planet he the bigfoot came from.  theres a woman in curlew wa who has the name of this planet.  bf are extraterrestrial & function as guards to keep us from probing the mtns to inspect et ops.  ets also operate undersea works. imo they are making dna which they inject into us while sleeping to enhance our health.  theyve been w. us from the beginning of our appearance on earth

years '10 & '11 were my last at the bitterroot ranch at camas prairie mt.  it was jan '10 when i noticed lesions on honeys left ear.  she was so distracted by the mites that she bit me.  a neighboring rabbiteer told me of an antibacterial the name of which ive forgot. but i soon remembered the good old germ & mite killer called powdered sulfur.  this did the trick without messy ointments which ive learnt to abhor on the skin especially in joint areas.  there the skin must be left to breath. the skin is our largest & most active excretory organ. 

sulfur is also great for athletes food but the only place i can get it is online.  the drugstores dont make enuf money from it to sell it

mt has more snakes i think than the sw states per square mi. theyre the gopher snake & the prairie rattler.  the latter is much more docile than the diamondback.  i nearly stept on one

honey loves to sit under vehicles where she gets a breeze & the sun doesnt blind her.  one day deep in study & honey under the trailer & next to a wheel i felt i should check on her not realising there were any snakes nearby.  i shouldve known better since i was campt between 2 drumlins.  snakes like to live in hill country for in cold weather they can sun themselves on s. exposures & when its hot they can cool themselves on the n. sides

i felt i could ignore internal warnings no longer.  outside my door i saw 2 gopher snakes both of which slid under the trailer where honey was sitting.  theyre quite passive.  you can walk right past them & they dont move.  but i was hysterical.  i hollered to her & took down the trailer guard fence which keeps cows from scratching themselves against ones trailer & thus denting it, even destroying it.  any romanticism toward cows vanishes quickly when one lives on a ranch

luckily i removed her without further event

i wonder why the snakes just sat near my door rather than going straight for her.  they probably realised that there was no way they were going to swallow a fat bunny

abt 3 weeks after moving onto the ranch there was a mother bear & yearling that came to the ranch.  i cooked & distilled water at the compound where id seen the baby at abt 600 ft. one day.  on the day after id seen the baby but never the mother i had a boat horn canister which i took down there just in case i saw mama.  i took a circular route down so as not to be jumped on out of a compound building.  when i got close enough to see baby i looked abt to see if mama was there.  sure enuf there she was standing on her 2 legs at abt 8 ft tall next to the portaloo.  i retraced my steps back circularly to my trailer & luckily mama didnt charge me.  never did i get precisely between her & baby

near where i lived someone saw a wolfpack & another at a different time saw a direwolf a species which is supposed to have gone extinct eons ago

once when hitching the 10 mi into town i was pickt up by a moslem family who lived in nearby ronan.  it was a little daunting for i didnt want to step on any verbal explosive mines. i spoke of my interest in bigfeet which was a bit dodgy for it might have opened up a fight abt the impropriety of mixing what many people think of as animals w. humans.  a form of miscegenation that seems to trouble us greatly but if that mine existed it didnt explode 

then the matter of images came up for the kids were interested in photography.  islam has a complex taboo against images. as w. so much of islam the whole theory hasnt been harmonised i dont think.  thats why there are abt 4 main schools of muz law theory.  but given that now islam seems to be in free fall and that i sidestept the issue by saying i went thru an enthusiastic stage for photos when young but now i saw no point in collecting them.  you look at them a few times & thats it.  too much pain in getting them.  not enuf pleasure in having them

once i paid a woman to take me to the polson mt organic store. we got talking abt something racial & i said something (i forgot what) the brat she turned out to be didnt like.  she ordered me to cut out the race jibes in her car.  as usual i was not quick enuf mentally.  its the minnesota stupor i think.  if that ever happens again im going to ask the driver to let me out & to give me my money back

im a 100%er w. the bill of rights which the supreme court has largely destroyed. like jefferson i believe that the supreme court is supremely a bad idea & i hold to the bill only & ignore supreme court judgments

july 2011 & it was off to danville wa

id been given a hint that an old man sees them all the time nr the canadian border.  when i got there the probable old man turned out to have been dead abt 15 ys

jack lapseritis planned to be there that year too.  i was excited about that.  but he told me his bigfoot friends told him they wanted him to live w. them.  so my 2 leads to the danville area evaporated

when hitching in ne wa i was pickt up by 2 seemingly gay old men who told me of a friend one had who claimed to have spent a winter living w. a group of bf on the pacific crest trail.  but i didnt get their friends name.  their huge dowg harasst me so much & i was too tired & there was a dowg near to where they let me off (im dowg phobic but i usually tell people im allergic to dowgs so that they wont tell me my dowg is really nice...youll love him).  dowg owners seem to be hard of hearing...in denial of the fact that some of us would like to see the dowg species & family go extinct

i think the reason for the dowgs popularity is that dowg food is big business.  i wonder how much they financed the movie ol' yeller.  dowgs were riding high until working moms had to leave their dowgs home where they could defecate & bark and incense the neighbors who prolly called the cops

july 2012 i & honey my rabbit set out for fairbanks ak. we hitchhiked to the yuppie town of bellingham wa.  we slept in fields off the road.  at the junction of us 40 & i-80 i got so pissed off at not being able to get a ride that i started walking northeast on the freeway i-80.  a cop (he queried me much abt bigfoot when he found out i was a bf enthusiast) stopt us & took us to the nearest rest stop on the freeway where we spent the night.  i used honey as bait & 2 women & a boy gave us a ride of abt 800 mi.  i gave them $50 for gas not realising how dear gas is now.  i hadnt had a veec for 43 ys.  prolly i shouldve given them more

when we got to wa we got stuck & a woman gave us some coins saying 'obviously youve got problems'

after wed left our ride we walked to a small town where i couldnt find a place to sleep.  we were pestered by a gay fellow driving around town in early morning.  i think i finally walked n. of town & dossed down in a field

we were coming up to 4 july & the natives were getting restless. lots of them were mexicans.  one of the towns we went thru is the watermelon capital of the us which draws many immigrants legal & illegal.  for sleeping we stayed out of urban areas except in richland where we slept in a field behind a home depot. there were holes all about us where i imagine rats dwelt.  i tied up honey so she couldnt be chased away without me knowing abt it. even so she mightve wandered away as she was to do in fairbanks

then we got to kenniwick wa whose people are among the nastiest in the country.  we stood alongside a major hiway out of town half the day & got no ride.  i was so angry i threw the bag honey was in against a boulder & didnt care if i killed her or not

heres the place for a long tutorial on transference of guilt.  shed been confined to a carrier bag all day at the end of the day she was knocking her head against the zipper so she could get out. but theres something abt faultfinding that in the absence of a clearly guilty party seeks to release anger against anyone esp. against a weak party who will not retaliate.  this is scapegoating which is in the bible in the form of animal sacrifices.  all religions except perhaps buddhism seem to have had or still have animal sacrifices.  i believe the goodness of a society can be measured by the amount of brutality against animals.  however i think predator animals should be made extinct by a method as painless and efficient as possible.  i think humans will give up meat when they take a look at the health problems caused by meat eating.  for decades the meat industry has been lying to us in saying that we need animal protein to keep healthy

animal fat is stickier that plant fat.  it sticks to the arteries & causes plumbing problems.  heart attacks & strokes

the best way to deal w. anger is not by using a scapegoat but by changing the mental channel

immediately go to a predetermined channel. go to it before the wrath is let out.  we are highly hypnotic creatures.  we must always be ready to break the hypnotic trance of sticking w. what our minds are on.  we have great mental inertia.

another way of dealing w. anger is to repeat the outrage of say dropping something to allay the anger.  if you accidently drop one thing drop another to show self that dropping things isnt the end of the world.  this is the homeopathic principle.  i wonder if there is a society in which anger isnt usually transferred from self to some other entity.  we humans are big babies who cant take the heat of responsibility

another town from hell in wa is monroe only 9 mi from the home of my favorite bigfooter jack lapseritis.  you must read his second book called the sasquatch people.  i was so enraged at the callousness of the people of monroe most of who seemed to be bikers that i wasnt aware how close to jacks place i was

2 days i was stranded there.  i prayed/decreed very intensely & a very amiable gent & car seemed to emerge from the pavement.  he carried me down to i believe n. jackson park a n. suburb of seattle where the next day i got a ride from someone who was raised in christian science but drifted away.  this frequently happens in cs.  it seems to take desperation for us to go into cs.  this religion doesnt pass down well from gen to gen. im always looking for a more powerful belief system but have yet to find one

id just missed the ferry to ak.  so i had a 12 day wait in what turned out to be a very yuppie town judging by the coop organic store where it seemed most of the young men were earnest students of medicine & law.  after i had displayed honey for the clients of the store in the outside al fresco dining area of the store i wasnt able to bring her inside.  apparently some of the young men were envious of the attent from the young women i was getting by showing her off.  ive reported the situ of the store on topix.net which is a very good way of exposing wrong by o-fishy-ulls.  i think they paid a price for having my first article removed.  but i put up a second.  i hope never to see that town again

on board the ferry we saw some very unspectacular scenery. the norway fiords are much more spectacular.  forget the 'inside passage' the sexual hint of which seems to appeal to many an old person who are largely the ones who go to ak by that route

the gushies of the left have a great gush for orca (killer) whales at this moment in history.  whenever a school of orcas was seen the gushies would run to the side of the ferry the orcas were on & gush as they watched the orcas w. field glasses

since orcas are predators id like to see them put out of their misery

i met a retired physix prof who told me that in no way is gravity an electromagnetic force which i believe it is

honey had to stay on the bottom deck w. the cars many of which were loaded w. dogs.  it was noisy & i feared she wouldnt endure the 5 day voyage.  but she did.  when we had shore leave id take her w. me.  i askt but was denied permis to take her w. me on the upper decks 

hitching a ride is very hard in ak.  ak is largely peopled by those who have personality problems and that is why they left the mainland.  drugs alcohol mental problems murder-all social evils-are among the highest rates in the us.  when i was terrorised by 2 shooters of assault rifles i was given no sympathy by those i tried to get such from.  i went to 7 nodes of power.  i have no desire to return to ak.  but not far from anchorage i got a ride w. a lovely couple from va all the way to fairbanks.  they were a military couple.  but as is typical they didnt want my email.  why are people so terrified of email.  do they think all their letters are avidly read by the intel community.  i love to exchange emails w. anyone whos willing. they can put me on a mailing list.  if their thoughts are boring i can always ask them to take me off

id planned on marking my 70th birthday w. a trip to the arctic circle but the driver of a  tourist van company went to the wrong address by not following my drex precisely.  so i cancelled that trip.  remember the good old days when the customer was almost always right.  now its just the reverse

we camped along college rd the northern boundary of fairbanks between the fairgrounds & the farmers mkt.  there was bird vetch vines aplenty which greatly pleased honey.  normally id tie her up before i went to sleep.  but one night she chewed her way thru the tether.  i didnt see her for almost the whole of the next day.  late in the avo i started cursing her loudly.  out of the edge of my vision i saw her at abt 100 ft in the woods & i was delighted.  my anger was gone immediately 

the beast gov under which we live requires a veterinarian certificate every time we take our pets w. us on public transport even if we got one shortly before.  in my case 2 mo before.  so i had to get 2 exams for ear mites in a 2 mo period.  ive never been checked for a cert when traveling w. honey.  so i think its mainly a money making scheme for veterinarians.  i believe ear mites are endemic w. rabbits & most small mammals.  the best one can do is to keep the infect down.  a nasty woman keeper of a pet product store in moab zion/utah told me that one does of pyrethrum would keep the animal mite free for life but i didnt believe her

after the terrorism of me & honey we moved down the road a bit toward the farmers mkt & stayed in a abandoned tepee that was submerged in the ground abt 1 ft.  it was rounded on top. its the kind i guess the indians of that area (i think most are athabascan) favor.  the submergence wards against it being blown over in a blizzard

when the glorious moment to leave ak came we walkt to the airport for it was so close to our camp site. how nice not to have to call a cab

at salt lake i hitched a ride by a mormon convert.  he was so interested in cs & bigfoot that he took me home.  100 miles out of his way!  i gave him a copy of lapseritis' bigfoot book which he was greatly interested in

just before we set out for nc i was pickt up by a politician named swaysee.  'oddly' the next day i was stopt by a state trooper & told that if i promised not to hitch any more id be spared of a ticket.  i wasnt abt to promise anyone not to do something that was part of my nature.  so i got a $40 ticket which i contested in a very noisy court battle helped by jerry mcfadden a nonmormon neighbor who helpt me in other ways and who took the mike along w. me in the courtroom.  the judge blathered out that the supreme ct had oked states' antihitching laws.  i knew he was lying by his mannerism/speech.  i checkt out the us supreme ct cases & found that they had never dealt w. the legality of gov antihitching laws. of this i informed the judge on facebook & told him hed been blowing smoke up my arse.  months later he told me hed searched the website & come up w. the same conclusion

in the hearing id maintained that antihitching laws violated the bill of rights guarantee of peaceful assembly

how i wish there was an anti unfunded mandate so i could fight obamacare in court if i got summoned   


november 2012 i set out from zion which is utah to finish my tour of america which i started when i was 16.  one can mention any state of the union & ive stayed in it or an adjoining state at least 6 wks.  my first stop was in warrenton mo where my brother has a farm.  i didnt want to see him & his wife because there is poison between us but esp between me & his wife.  if i say something that he doesnt like he cuts me off for 10 ys & then forgives me.  he should be a lawyer hes such a manipulator.  i dont know what set him off 9 ys ago. this is the second period of silence from him & i hope it continues until death parts us.   i didnt want to face those 2 angry faces.  he treats me worse than he would a 2 yr old child.  but its fine w. me cuz i dont have to deal w. them.  i went into the general store & by & by ran into the owner of same, the first person who knew my bro. he said they had moved 1 mi away which is queer.  why build a beautiful house on a large farm & then move 1 mi. away.  i dont know what led to the remark i made that my brother is a spoilt youngest child but the man said 'so are you'.  i think hes the sort who will give a version of 'it takes one to know one' any time criticism of a 3rd party is given.  he & his wife were fellow church members at the dominant church in town a presbyterian church.  presbos are in the calvinist tradition which i like but such people can get too mean.  this man was carrying forward the presbo tradition of nastiness.  calvinism on steroids

if im spoilt because my mother was my enabler then so be it. once she said i could be arrogant at times.  soit (french). the last thing i want to be is its reverse.  a doddering idiot  

my mother was my empowerer.  that could be called spoiling.  if so id like to see many more likewise spoilt kids rather than the many kids who are nearly strangled to death by their parents. long after her death i found out she was a direct descendant of king david of israel.  no wonder she was such a good yiddische mama

soon i arrived in pisgah national forest nc.  one midday i was doing something when i heard a crunching sound in the gravel of a parking lot abt. 30 ft from me.  5 very loud crunchings.  afterwards i checked to see if there was anyone there.  nobody. this was my first encounter w. a bf

i checked w. the number one bigfoot-as-psychic authority in the the world jack lapseritis who said that was bigfoot

don't go to a national forest during hunting season.  in arizona & montana its hunting season all year round.  the shooting spoils any camping trip.  a man asked a favor of me which i for good reason refused.  shortly bomb like thereafter gun shots went off near me.  i regard hunters as among the trash of the earth.  they have unresolved anger problems.  im for open season on hunters

i stayed in nc for 6 weeks.  it was all i could take of the place.  i don't like north carolinians.  theyve a military/fascist culture.  20 ys ago it was the thing for new yorkers & new jerseyans to retire to nc.  far less to drive at hols to see the grandkids.  but now i imagine such retirees think better

next i went to virginia & stayed mainly in hampton roads.  i was thrilled to visit evangelist pat robertsons campus/tv center.  colonial buildings.  lots of em. immaculately kept up

in my grubby clothes i entered the recept center during a huge wedding recept

i liked hampton.  it is abt 50/50 black/white.  the racial sit seemed good to me.  norfolk is also abt 50/50 but since its a navy town w. people from all around the country its a little iffy in racial tension

one thing i missed out on is visiting the surrender site of cornwallis to washington in yorktown which is the next town to hampton

then i went to the eastern shore of va. & spent too long a time.  the trouble w. the place is that there is so little public beach that its hard to find such a place when one wants to just chill out.  but its a pretty place.  especially looking out over chesapeake bay

i found out that 6 weeks is all i can take of a state when im touring.  this was especially true of nc.  i was glad to leave all of the 3 east coast states after 6 weeks.  the upper east coast is a great place economically but rents are high & housing conditions for single people are bad

theres a family nr westminster md that i had thought to contact in person.  they have a tremendous bf story.  a bigfoot threw an intruder into a bf dwelling 25 ft through the air.  but knowing the hesitancy of such people to talk to strangers i gave up the idea of going there & headed for n hampshire.  in md i gathered a pint of sand from the ocean beach which i still have.  im a romantic.  in love w. the far off  

theres a bridge in delaware that is right out of hell.  it crosses the chesapeake/delaware canal.  the bridge is high enough to allow ocean supertankers to go under it without raising a portion of it.  theres no drawbridge. the bridge is only a 2 laner.  it soars up over the canal.  it seems the locals dont like it for it has almost no traffic.  theres another bridge to the west which they must use & even tho its part of a toll highway the locals seem to greatly favor it.  i got half way up it & jammed on the brakes.  i couldn't go any further.  i figured a trouper would have to back my van down to where i started or to the other side.  there was no way i was going to cross that bridge.  but then i thought if i just concentrate on the road just ahead of me & block out the rest ill make it.  and i did

from de i took a very old & congested hwy called us 1.  it dates back to before the interstate (i-whatever) era.  my car was boiling over due to the very slow traffic and many traffic lights thru philadelphia and nj.  that nite i stayed at a servo.  nearby was the seminary that id thought of going to.  westminster sem.  but calvin sem was much closer to home so i went there  

i can never go thru nj without stopping at margie weeks place in summit.  her dad sigfrid & my dad were best friends/cobbers in sweden & when they both migrated to the us.  in mn we would get frequent visits from sigfrids family who thought of relocating to mn.  but that was after the war when housing was sparse/dear.  so they stayed in nj.  when i was 5 i got so excited when they came that i threw a fit & was confined to my bedroom by my lovely dad. later sigfrids wife commiserated w. me which goes to her eternal credit

in summitmargie wasnt home but her husband was.  he was friendly but treated me to a joke abt how 1 norwegian could defeat a swedish army.  its one thing i dont like abt swedes.  theyre terrific teasers

and clint isnt even swedish.  but he caught the virus

sigfrid & walter were raised in farm & lumber country in sweden so i have to forgive them

i shouldve waited longer to go to new england.  it was still only around the last of january when i got there.  i encountered 3 blizzards in nh.  the wind comes blasting from the ocean

nh has nice farmers on the left side & crass caterers to tourists on the right side

going from woodsville to hanover on the left side of the state i saw a beautiful tall white congregational church w. farmers all dressed in dark suits standing outside in the cold talking to each other after church.  these are people whodve invited me to dinner after a few meetings

i stopt at dartmouth college a very handsome campus indeed & used one of their mac system puters and was it smoooooth!  eventually this system or the new google one is bound to replace the horrid gates ones unless the gates gets his act together

bye & bye i arrived in portsmouth nh & stopt at a drop in center to see what they offered.  it was just like something out of 1984.  i was on the phone & someone came to me w. a paper that had to be signed no matter that i was in the middle of a conversation.  if youre the type who loves total gov go to that drop in center or id say any such center & take notes

my target in nh was conway in the white mountains forest.  n. conway is commerce on steroids.  they do a tremendous trade in skiing.  the thought that thered be bigfeet to see there flew out the window

had i gone to the w. part of the forest particularly a road called kangamagus i mightve had joy.  but thered been lots of snow & i didnt dare driving high mountain roads w. my 2 wheel drive (ive seen it function as a no wheel drive vehicle...dont know how that happens). so i couldnt get out of nh quick enough

while in the concord area i visited bow where mary baker eddy was born & grew up.  i stood on the base of her birth house.  i regard her & shankara as the 2 greatest theologs that i know of.  jc wasnt a theolog but reached people at whatever level he found them at.  a great populariser

as soon as my 6 weeks in nh were up i rushed out of the state back to the rural west where i now belong since im a bigfooter & a pensioner on a small pension

i stopt at merle carlsons birthtown, jamestown ny in the far west part of the state. pastor merle had let me hold evening services in our lutheran church.  this to the dread of lutherans who feel that sleeping thru one service on sunday is all that is needed to assuage a sleepy lutheran god

merle was kind of sleepy himself, a sufferer of myasthenia gravis & like me suffered from a too active immune system.  i may harbor a touch of this too. but in my case the symptoms were systemic eczema & hayfever both of which ive got rid of

as he aged merle became loony left.  i asked him about the illegal aliens & he said what illegal aliens.  i asked him abt the huge cost of the various welfare programs & he said what welfare programs

nevertheless he buried my dads remains & that was one of the best things he couldve done

from jamestown i went north abt 20 mi to the largest spiritualist colony in the world lilydale ny.  there are abt 200 victorian houses there w. shingles hanging out for mediums & for souvenirs.  it costs money to get into town which depends on how many there are in the car. it was out of season so i got in free.  ive never wholly trusted mediums thinking they should do what they do free.  but it takes energy to do a session so i guess im in the wrong especially when one considers they may depend on fees for a living

if someone from the other side wants to contact me same can do so & ill be the medium

on i-86 the highway thru the above area my van broke down.  when that happens i await a good samaritan.  it took abt 45 min but one came.  he beat the hiway patrol. in abt 1/2 hr he had the break in a wire from my battery gerry rigged & a yr later it is still holding

driving down i-71 from cleveland to cincinati i had the feeling that ohio was the most patriotic of all us states. a conventional patriotism of barbeques & parades both of which i hate.  but the idea that patriotism isnt dead in the us gives me a good feeling for i know not what reason.  i guess it is that people still have ideals outside the ideal of mere survival, corrupt as these ideals are

after kentucky my next state was tn.  by getting to gnashville id made a complete circle.  my spelling since i dont like country music

then it was on to arkansas.  i thought it might be nice to visit hot springs, watering hole for the new orleans mafia but it was too far off the freeway.  i knew an italian fellow in hot springs mt who met the new orleans capo of that citys mafia carlos marcello on the road to hot springs ar years before.  marcello is i believe universally reputed to have brought abt the killing of jfk. 

i tooled off to tx where i went down i-30 & turned north at sweetwater.  my lord how many of the denomination church of christ there are in central tx.  this is yet another spawning of calvin

turning n. at sweetwater one encounters windmill territory. perhaps 1000 of them

roswell nm was my next stop.  home of the famous supposed crash of a ufo in i think 1947.  i think it was a plot by our gov to get people interested in space because space was to take lots of money & us yanx had to be softened up for the money

in driving to roswell i went thru an appealing little town called tatum nm.  it appealed to me because it was somewhat run down & quite mexican & i thought i might get a cheap place to park for the winter.  later i would find out the truth that they had a fascist police force whose chief had the grinding voice of north carolina, i think the worst us accent there is

for a long time i had idealised taos nm thinking it to be a misty almost mythical place of artists & other intellectuals so i went there.  at first site of the place i knew i wouldnt like it.  to corporate/plastic.  i found out it was peopled by thirtyish people who had lost their way in life & were just drifting.  it was mainly people w. the compulsion to link w. another but never finding the right one.  i found just such a couple. brandon & julia on what is called the mesa.  i was in the organic store called cids & up to me walked a tall irish looking fellow all smiley who wanted to know if i had a cell phone.  we started in talking abt the biblical bathsheba.  i dont know what brought that subject on.  i think bathsheba took her sun bath where she knew david could see her because she wanted to dump her hub who was away at war.  this story fit in nicely w. taos and slab city where i am as i write this.  both places are 

peopled by couples who secretly want to find new lovers in these places

it turns out that brandon & julia were in that category & would soon do an angry split up.  i wish i had the opp'y

of clueing in this type of person that sexual magnetism costs a lot more than what we get out of it & should be scrapt

after spending 3 days w. brandy as i call him i fell in love w. him.  yes here was my biblical 7th fall into that pit called love.  but quickly julia suspected something was afoot & got hysterical which meant that brandy didnt get his usual weekly frig w. her which meant he went into a bad snit which got him banned from her trailer.  either he was convinced to go into therapy or was forced to by court order for he went

i never saw him again & i dont think he had any designs upon me

quickly i decided to head for az where id planned to check out the famed new age place called sedona w. its rust colored outcroppings.  so after my routine 6 weeks in a state had elapsed i went to sedona.  the brandy romance's half life lasted for abt 2 mo after he left julia

it was abt this time that i discovered my dimcit (subconscious) had always tripped me up in past love attempts because really i want to live my life alone.  i vahnt to be let alone said greta garbo.  she had sense. its nice to think of those weve loved in the past & be glad theyre no longer present.  im a control freak not over others but over myself & my environ

i was immediately appalled by the plastic corporate look of sedona.  in all i spent just a few hours there.  i found cottonwood az to be much more to my liking w. free camping on blm land n. of town.  but cottonwood gets hot in summer so i went to the much cooler flagstaff at 7000 feet. there quickly i found out that poachers rule the forests of az.  if one protests over the shooting theyre told 'we were just target practising'.  the fedgov is slipping into irrelevancy so dont expect them to segregate shooters from nonshooters.  the state is no better.  i wrote the state gov 2 times without response. az is all abt assholism.  its now my most hated state edging out hawaii.  dont talk to arizonans abt the problem.  theyre afraid to touch on the subject for fear theyll step on some big toes.  below the ponderosa pine line which runs from nw to se az theres lots of scrubland.  there are some blm campgrounds which are free of shooting for theres nothing to shoot

in 64 i voted for goldwater & ive supported the ranchers along the mexican border who dont want their ranches trashed by illegals.  but the takeover of the forests by terrorists has changed all that

the prescott forest is scrubland so one wouldnt expect shooting.  on my first saturday there the good ol' boys came out for a shooting fest/target practise during which i heard bullets fly over my head.  has anyone made the link between shooting & freefloating anger/hatred.  id like to see hunting banned except for bounty hunts to kill certain animals when they become a problem & to rid the world of predators

soon i got the desire to go back to nm  & went there where i heard no shooting.  also i wanted to check out silver city for camping.  but there were no free public campgrounds there.  so i popt over to truth or consequences to see if i could find my illusive h.s. classmate roger swanson.  he wasnt there but i put my analytic powers to work to see how his bizniz could be improved.  he has a bed & breakfast place.  later i wrote him w. my suggestions & he was grateful

then i went to the old fashioned town of clovis nm.  one of my ancestors is king clovis of the frankish states, which prove that the so called dark ages (476-1000 ad) were not that dark

i needed to get new tags for my car.  i found out i couldnt get a license plate from nm since i didnt have a street address.  i suppose i couldve paid someone to receive my mail on a c/o basis but thatd be awkward not knowing a person.  maybe roger in torc wouldve done me that favor.  but i didnt think of asking him via email

so i thought to go back to zion which is utah to get the tags.  this was a mistake.  they have draconian laws for getting licences for old cars there.  at moab i was informed id have to get a checkup for my van which would be quite involved.  i made a face & the office worker for tags said 'aw shit huh?'  she prolly was mormon but mormons are very much like us. but the gov of utah is rather stricter than other states in all areas of law.  in st george ut i went to an inspect garage & a man started rattling off the things that needed to be done to the van. i headed off to yuma az where i thought things might be less stringent

on my way i wanted to see if i could see art bell in pahrump nv.  he started the coast to coast am show on radio.  its a paranormal show that runs 7 nites per week for 4 hours.  i used to listen to it a lot until my rabbit made it known to me she got nervous over me having the radio on.  so i gave the radio to someone who helpt me get my car unstuck when my wheel went over the edge of raised roadway in az

i saw death valley was nearby so i took off for it.  believe it or not theres an opera house there.  but i dont think its operational anymore

id seen 'soft shoulders' signs on hiways all my life but never askt myself what they meant. i found out when pulling off the hiway into sand & was stuck for 3 hrs.  no one stopt to help but i wanted it that way for i like to learn how to do things alone in case i have to in future. what did the trick was to dig out the wheel & put down old plant branches to get a grip.  now a have a stout plank to put under the spinning wheel

gas in the valley was $5/gallon (about $3.50 elsewhere) and i remember only 2 servos in abt 100 mi of travel

at indio ca my engine froze on me.  when we get all electric cars we wont have the cooling problems which for me have been my major problem w. my van.  i could go only abt 2 mi per topping up w. water.  i dont know how an engine w. a hairline crack can lose water as fast as they do.  i guess in my case it was more than hairline cracks in my cylinder head & block.  it was that i had no gaskets on either side of my v8 engine

i limpt down to niland ca where i was told there was a free no limit to length of stay and only 2 mi away.  it was the now famous among campers slab city ca owned by the state and since 1961 allowing no limit camping.  its not just hippies here.  theres a retired rc priest, a retired psychiatrist, a professional artist and many just plain elderly snowbirds.  

where im parked its very quiet except for the occasional eggbeater overhead & a little detone of explosives due to the naval training center nearby

slab city featured in the film abt the young man mccandless who perisht nr mt mckinley in alaska

in my van it gets awful hot during the day even in winter. i can take it but my rabbit suffers.  so ill be headed to much higher country soon.  i want to go to a wooded area for bigfoot but there are hunters/poachers in woods in the west particularly az.  ill let the bf come to me in scrubland.  in az hunters/poachers/terrorists are there all yr round.  try to find a game warden in az.  the poachers are so cheeky they pile up the waste deer parts where these parts can be seen easily in order to serve notice on the public that theyre in charge of the national forests at least those in az.  i dont know abt ca or nv.  i will not tolerate shooting within earshot.  by time of year or by distance the fedgov should segregate shooters and campers/hikers.  id like to see open season on hunters

ive tried to locate the man at slab who operates a pirate fm station.  id like to do a few shows to see how relevant my material is to the slab audience.  but the owner seems to have a cordon sanitaire around him

situation normal.  al is frustrated

but since i entered the above ive found the man. hes very timid & wouldnt want a firebrand like me on board his radio station.  hes a native of the great town of bayside queens ny.  walking distance from him i lived in rego park queens for abt 6 mo.

i brought honey to see the artist along & he loved petting her.  shes a good publicity agent esp for women & sensitive men

but hes one of the minority who wants slab city incorporated.  that would make it like most of america which i dont like.  ca has abt 400 unincorporated areas. id like to see more all over the planet for people like me who feel we shouldnt have to work in order to justify our existence

as i write this im in a quandary what to do w. my van. the head & the block are both cracked.  to fix it would cost at least $1000.  am i better off buying another clunk.  this one gave me 15000 mi for its cost of $1500.  both alternatives are fraught w. problems.  how i wish i could get by without a car.  but i have so much paper memorabilia to store that i dont want to part w.  besides in most campgrounds theres a 14 day limit.  so i need a car to jockey between campgrounds.  i could put my stuff in a locker & come back each winter to the slabs to commune w. it.  i admire the ascetics who hold on to nothing.  im not secure enuf for that

in abt mid feb '14 some bikers came for a do.  they were middle class well groomed bikers but they were straight out of hell.  they didnt come on motorcycles but in cars. all nite long for 3 nites they exploded fireworks.  up until 6 in the am.  finally someone called the cops & 5-8 squadcars showed up & the bikers were history

the bikers had softened up the caretaker couple of salvation mtn near to which the bikers camped by joining a work crew.  even after 3 nites of hell the caretaker wife raved abt how clean & courteous the bikers were.  the power of the bribe.  to me they were demons from hell

now its march & the main season at slab city is past

im hoping to learn how to rid myself of the contempt for a place which emerges after a stay in the place & which forces me to hit the road.  road fever.  i think its a dissatisfact w. ones life which one hopes to fix by finding new ideas by traveling the road.  this idea was given me by mrs zellmer

its 12 mar 2014 & i had to do a job on a 3 week acquaintence of mine.  his handle at slab city is pat the hat.  he has a much too familiar spirit.  loves to tease.  

he goes drunk w. teasing.  so i gave him a note (i refuse to speak to him apart from the net) w. my email & told him intel talk only.  anything veering from that will not be answered.  also i think he saw me take down his license number in case i have to get a restraining order

the silliness was gone out of pat the hat at the bus stop this am!  instead i got the welcomed gruff

hes a strong hebephrenic & i used that word on him.     

hope he looks it up & fixes himself but at this early point in human history its naive to hope for such an event

the 2 good ol' boys/muscle class crackers who diagnosed my engine by opening it down to the pistons are playing a game w. me.  after i asked where the loose parts were i was told not to worry.  they had them in a box.  after i had my engineless car towed to a quiet camping spot i asked again for my parts.  one of the losers said hed put my parts alongside my car when it was parked at their place. this loser is drunk most of the time & was given a church by the former pastor who realised he wasnt going to get members from the largely hippy community and the many close fisted canadians who live there

you ask me why i chose these 2.  because theyre the only mechanix i know of in my area.  plus when i had an engine i had only a range of abt 3 mi before i had to add abt 2 gals of water to the radiator

on 7 june 2014 2 police cars pulled up to me w. the lame excuse that they thought i was a guy who went missing from the slabs a yr ago.  if that was the case why didnt they just wave at me & drive off once they saw i wasnt the guy

its because theyre nosey & want to have an alibi to question me

we no longer have a constitution in the us, but as i understand how things were when we had one police could only conduct an inquisition if there had been a specific crime done & there was good reason to believe i was the perp.  courts were the ones to do inquisitions. this concept comes from the 4th amendment & is summed up by the phrase 'reasonable cause'

i started yelling at cops at the walmart in pisgah nc 24 dec 2012.  nice c'mas present to myself.  they were the 2 pasty faced boys mentioned earlier.  since then ive done it at least 2 times including to weeks ago.  its worth an infinity of counselling.  i dont know if i challenged one of the cops to shoot me but at least i contemplated it

i shouted im so disgusted w. this planet that im suicidal. the lead cop suggested i go to the hospital for treatment. arent cops bighearted!  i didnt go into the c. science laws that most states have which outlaw involuntary hospitalisation.  instead i said everyone is suicidal.  at that point it occurred to me that we could live indefinitely in the flesh if we didnt harbor a bit of suicidal thinking

theres a joke in here because cops have one of the highest suicidal rates of all.  so do psychiatrists

my trip to india is going forward.  ive applied for a passport.  india is snakefree above 9000 feet.  im looking for a town at least that high.  dont like the king cobra

simla is 7000 feet but has an excellent range of temperatures.  but i want something higher & less population.  i know ill open up to the cosmic internet & find just what im looking for.  i need guidance w. the medit of the highest sort so i can live off prana & can forget my dependence on social security

some holy man will break into my sense & help me

a cop awoke me at 520 am on monday 25 aug '14 checking on me.  they do this to everyone on the slabs even though its designated as a designated free space whatever that means

i believe there will be cop free spaces all over the world in future to accommodate people like me who like to live as easy a life as possible.  let the residents remove the predator people

on 24 july '14 we had the highest temp of the summer 117.  i dont plan on doing another summer here. about the only thing i like about it is theres no rent to pay

it is portrayed as a hippy camp but the young campers only look hippy.  they dont have the strong ideology and paranoia of the fascist hippys of the late 60s.  theyre much friendlier.  besides theyre greatly outnumbered by the elderly some of who have money

on 3 sep '14 i was asleep at 9.30 p & heard a noise.  i lookt out my windows & saw a huge assortment of lights around & coming from 3 or 4 what lookt ultra modern sculpted steam shovels without the beam & shovel arm & bucket. it was like a circus because of the artificial lights.  i was groggy & lay down again.  when i looked again in a few minutes they were gone

a few days before i had listened to a youtube piece w. music for opening up the third eye which i think sees into the astral realm, the realm of ghosts bigfeet ufo's past & future scenes out of body trips etc

if it ever happens again im going to get dressed & head out to take a close look.  i was only 700 ft from the objects

as of today 29 oc 14 im thinking of waiting til spring to go to the himalayas.  its too cold to be in mtns in the winter.  i could go to india now & await spring in the lowlands but that would mean extra visa costs, dust, noise and the smell of human and animal feces.  also its going to take me a while to find a place to leave my van w. my stuff in it.  i want a dwelling place (van) to come back to

at the slabs someone pissed off somebody else & the trailer or motorhome of the first was burnt down.  i dont know but guess that the cops werent called to start a suit.  this is because the morons who live on the slabs are afraid of advertising crime there for fear the place will be shut down.  many consider it their permanent home even if they spend only part of the year there

on 31 mar 2015 i flew out of los angeles to katmandu, nepal.  taxi drivers would be the bane of my trip as it was in kat, but i had the courage to walk to town from the airport

kat is a very air polluted town.  it sits in a valley.  so the air circulation isnt good.  many people wear masks.  i had heard in this part of the world people defecate in open view & dont bury the stuff

i didnt find that to be true in either nepal or india.  but the people who ride buses intercity piss nr. the side of the road though the women take pains to hide while so doing

i wanted to live in the country so i went to banepa which has been in the news because it was the epicenter of a few afterquakes after the big one which it deserved after how it treated me

in the country i found a place w. a family to stay in the back yard.  as during most of my trip diarrhea had me & i didnt have the sense to keep it secret.  when the kids saw used toilet paper about they brought out medicine.  i dont take patented medicine (human designed).  so i declined whereupon they called the police.  apparently theres a law in nepal that if you have visitors staying w. you & they get sick in anyway they must go to hoz

i hollered at the pig police chief for abt an hour & then the oily bastard had me taken to the hoz courtyard where a more compliant underling finally called the us embassy & a man who worked for both embassy & hoz appeared & was very understanding of me & got me released.  but i had to go to a certain hotel where i could be watched all night by an armed guard standing in an adjacent bldg

if you go to that country stay at a hotel.  there you have privacy

i dont like to see the world drifting toward totalitarianism.  in the parliament of nepal abt half the delegates are communists

i wouldnt ever want to go back to that country & i think the earthquake that occured 6 days after i left nepal was triggered off by my gethsemane experience.  this was followed in later days by a few aftershocks in that town called banepa

the biker fenom is all over the world.  in pokhara nepal there was a biker parade w. one bloke bracing his bike up high enuf so that he could burn rubber while standing still.  this was to prove that he was a real adolescent when he was prolly 40 

fast forward to jan '16

im in the midst of a love affair.  my 8th in my life

im never so lonely as when im in a love affair for when im not in love clearly i dont miss the presence of a lover. im quite to go on in my mind expanding way

we are all so complex and we try to comprehend the minds of people esp intimates

when we learn abt our new intimates were involved in a crash course

christian science advises us to believe everybody is perfect now but i say everyone is destined for perfection. therefore everybody is forced to accept their perfection ultimately & w. the help of cs & other very progressive systems they can jump the queue & resonate w. perfection

my beloved conveyed to me that he wouldnt go to india w. me so i cancelled the india demarche (frequently i show off my knowledge of french as in demarche since french is so elegant).  i saw a wry smile on his face when i told him id done so.  i dont know why the smile was wry.  only that he mustve had mixt feelings abt. the new development or he mightve felt i was not telling the truth

if he knew me better hed know that i stand behind my words

he was born in england but has a perfect yank accent. his shyness is one of the things that really turns me on &

has been a feature of almost all my men. shyness is a feature of youngest children so i guess im trying to replace my brother as he was as a young child, respectful

its abt a wk later than the line above this & i sent him a letter that id put a death curse on him

i met him abt 3 mo ago which was abt 11 months after his arrival. hes good looking & tall & thin & a sex maniac. i got grossed out by the various clues i got from him & others that he was sick.  i was strung out & went way over normal endurance & said to self this is too much. so invoked mt 18 18 & hung my hat

he just couldnt face me for a man to man conversation to straighten out the conflict between us

i hope im the coup de grace

its 22 1 16  & im in a much better mood having listened to john starnes sing when he was on the cross i was on his mind

i think hes into buggery which grosses me out even tho i find looking at buggery videos stimulates me but not as much as gospel music

his name is marty dixon born in liverpool uk

hes a youngest child w. all the garbage that that entails. i thought i was done w. youngest children when my nex w. my brother went belly up 20 ys ago

all i can say is that its gods will for the 2 of us to interact

all that happens is the will of god.  god is ever active in creating the new world.  god creates our wills

i will just have to endure this torture until the mission is complete

i dont shirk responsibility

india can wait

right now god has put in my heart to pursue this man

i deserve at least one period of love

today 28 1 2016 i did the boldest thing ive ever done in this campaign.  i told him that i believe hes hiv positive

this is a fellow who doesnt criticise me for prying into his life

4 days ago i put a comment in the slab city page on facebook urging men who like anal sex to go to marty's place to get same & they wouldnt regret it

i doubt that ill get any rebuke from marty

hes in rather great depression & incapable of much rebuke.  hes never rebuked me in the 3 mos weve known each other

even though this sounds as if hes a saint which he is in part hes also a psychopath in that he likes to hurt people

this is what schizophrenia does to people...divides ones life into cells between which there is too little communicate

we dont realise how odd we appear to others

3/2/2016

ive really battered him in my email to him

someone needs to take on this monster

but since i take anal sex to be monstrous we are living amongst a huge number of monsters. a yuppy mag such as marie claire says that almost half of hetero couples now practise this horror but i feel this data is fed to magazines by the nwo to bring down population

marty is very long suffering in my critiques of him.  hed prolly say im doing the best i can.  i havent heard a boo! from him.  he has a stony personality i guess from the hard lumps hes brought on himself.  i dont think id want to change places w. him.  i could lead his lifestyle if i was willing to go thru the hoops he goes thru but i would never do this for it would be the same as undergoing a brain transplant

17/2/16

when were scorned in love we tend to get hostile.  in my case i love to 'out' closet gays esp anal sex ones & have been doing so apace w. marty

we dont live alone on islands.  we shouldnt expect anonymity

if youre not proud of what youre doing, do something else

there seems to be a tribal tabu against looking into other peoples love affairs prolly because when we are in love we can get violent easily & the h. race has learnt this too well

were a much more intel race now & tabus should be damned

m. hasnt spoken to me in abt 3 mo which shows how passionate he is abt holding to his counsel

but he doesnt block my emails for by reading them he learns of my current mood re him & i educate him abt how i think

id like for him & me to merge & harmonise our souls so that were one soul in 2 bodies

i want to harmonise the marty/al thing before i start w. the bharat project.  but when we get together i dont think hell be any more enthusiastic abt bharat which means ill have to do what i want to do there from here

its a pity i didnt meet him when he arrived at slab city.  the socially active folks had 11 mo to find him out & court him.  he has a very active social/sex life so courtship w. him is easy

the trouble for me is that i have no social/sex life from which to pick a partner

a christian i prolly shouldnt do sex at all.  i havent figured it out yet.  surely total abstinence is the better way to go.  but i dont know how to achieve that state.  chasteberry certainly helps & may do the trick completely. ill have to experiment w. it

w. marty ive discovered that my constant provocations seem to be the best mo.  hes depressive & seems to need the stimulus.  if he were violent i mightve been afraid of too much provoke.  but hes very nonviolent & his lovers obey his commands.  what a difference tween him & my second love candidate who w. 2 others beat me up soundly for over playing my hand. homosexual love is not a pleasant activity esp. when one asks the question 'is longterm homosexual partnership even feasible?' 

my brief acquaintenceship in the 60s said no. at that time gay lovers were at most good friends who shared the same domicile.  but i think things are getting better now. thats if monogamy is a good thing

i dont know how long ill keep up this fight. all hed have to say is 'there is no future for you & me together'.  but of course he could change his mind which hes good at. hes addicted to 30something bums even tho hes abt 60.  i think he craves intimacy which is impossible w. such a wide age gap as between him & them.  plus 30something males who gravitate to older men who are gay tend to love to get into sames wallet. theyre an expensive pastime

if i just keep up showing how getting rid of his sex hangups alone could improve his life hugely (its really all he needs to do) & if i keep telling him how important he is to me he may see my logic.  but hes extremely stubborn which comes from being a youngest child.  ive a cousin carol who is in this class.  my brother is too. youngest children seem to be the most likely to get messed up & anal sex is a mess verging imo on murder & if one is famous its a publicity disaster no matter what the yuppy media tells us

if anal sex becomes ingrained can murder be far ahead. all m's sins seem to be the result of anal sex.  therefore if he develops a hatred against it all his sins will be wiped out

to look at him in his public stance hes very fastidious abt his appearance...but morally hes a disaster

folks listen to me nicely now!!  were on our own now. our moral leaders have been bought by the nwo.  this is our chance to develop moral muscle & we know this is why god has taken away the props & made us stand thanks to our own strength

m. doesnt seem to have any sense of what his future is to be.  i think im the only one who has set out a future for him.  most of the people at slab city are bums.  they have no specific goals for the future, esp goals that would cause them to grow

decades ago i was told by a pentecostal preacher that id be a great worker among gays since i have experience in both worlds

i think its true for challenges such as the marty challenge keep coming to me

2 3 16

sunday im starting weekly healing at my place at the very protestant hour of 11 am. the focus will be me laying my hand on those who want healing.  ill encourage theological questions

meanwhile back at the marty ranch.  our paths have been crossing more & more which means hes not trying to avoid me anymore.  failed love attempts last an average of 4 mo & weve gone past that so things are looking good.  hes sitting near me at the calipat library

daily ive been giving him the bizniz abt where hes gone wrong acc. to my lights

my medit has been we are god.  if so why fight.  but me putting insites into how i see him in daily letters to him has to help the integration of him & me which i now feel is happily inevitable

hes ultra sensitive so i have to tune into him whenever im w. him to see what he wants from me.  its like dealing w. a baby.  but i think id enjoy that.  ill have to learn how to read his mind.  i was a caretaker of my bro. for a yr when i was 4-5.  i feel a depth of compassion for marty that is enormous

hes highly conflicted & this is called schizophrenia which is a scary word but which can be fixt easily by taking inventory of ones strong beliefs abt dealing w. people & vetting them for inharmonies between the various beliefs

if you start out w. 'strength' you cant go wrong for that is what character is all about. then you decide honesty is important.  it doesnt clash w. strength.  then empathy which is all right as long as it doesnt lead to a pity party.  empathy helps to solve problems for by it we learn what ails the one w. who were working

next we go to friendliness which lubricates group dealings.  but the friendliness that leads to a party atmosphere isnt appropriate in a job setting

in the case of marty his big fissure of operating is hes too sensitive to the negative feelings of others 

22/3/16

ive just decided to give up the gay life entirely even though i havent been in it for 18 ys

but this is the strongest ive ever denounced it & its because of marty.  hes about the most uncompassionate person i couldve ever set my sights on.  but when life turns up a person like him consider it a blessing

now i can be heartfree

im not going even to call myself gay as i think to be gay is to be a fool...no a goddam fool

the gay mafia can come after me all they want & ill clobber them mentally

31/3/16

marty & a 35ish man i think is his lover broke into my van & took my birth cert. & my car title & some of my hebrew to english project & anything electronic they could find

i don't know what the motive for this was.  to me it was just a childish outbreak.  the only contact i have w. him is his email which he never answers.  5 months this has been going on

it may have been bad manners on my part to have written him many times when probably hes in a love affair.  but i don't like people who are secretly gay & i looooooove to out same!

if yer gonna play yer gonna pay!

how hes escaped the psychiatric mafia i don't know

people should be able to sit down to ease a conflict.  i know the aggressive one hates to give up on getting what same wants.  but the situation may turn around so that the antagonist may be able to deal w. the provocateur in future

i see a whole lot of martys psy in this theft.  he likes getting 'over on' people one way or another.  i wont go into the 'another' way.  i put a curse on him until i get my stuff back

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1mXKQV9VV8vq51-3bj1Bulw-JFYNO9u1uhxwOst05hsE/edit#heading=h.lebprb36z4j4

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